My name is Emily and I’m a control freak. (Everyone now – Hello, Emily). I wish that admitting this problem really was the first step to solving it, but the truth is I think with more than 30 years of control freak behavior under my belt, changing is going to require a lot more than 12 steps. And to be honest, in my day-to-day life being a control freak is a good way to be. Let’s face it. I’m in charge of a lot – both at work and at home and if I didn’t take control, who would? But when it comes to Christmas there are definite drawbacks. For one, taking on all of the responsibility associated with the holidays can be stressful, but as a person who thrives on to-do lists and deadlines that’s not really what bothers me. What does stink about being a control freak around the holidays is that it kind of takes the magic out of the whole thing. For example, I can’t remember the last time I was surprised by a gift my other half gave me. And to give the guy some credit, this is of no fault of his own. How could I be surprised when, for the most part, I orchestrate the searching, shopping and sometimes even the wrapping of said gifts? (Please tell me I’m not alone here ….) But I swear this year, I’m going to make it a goal to let go and let the magic in. I’ve created a wish list and instead of sending links, photographs and other hints as to what specific items I wish for or scheduling shopping time on Matt’s calendar, I’m going to let him handle it. He has great taste and it’ll be so nice to receive something I haven’t been staring at online for months. Perhaps more important is that hopefully letting go (even if it’s just a little) will give me more time to appreciate the truly magical parts of the season instead of micromanaging things, like my own gift buying, that really do not require micromanaging. Best case scenario is that this small step translates itself into a giant leap for me. If I can let go around Christmas imagine how magical my birthdays and anniversaries will be. On second thought, I may need a sponsor.
Emily Caswell is the Managing Editor of CAWLM. She has a passion for fun, family, friends, shopping sprees, cold drinks and Lansing.